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Romanian [Proto] New Wave [Literary Supplement Version], Part 7
Like every institution, theatres had to fulfil their own financial plan. With no one interested in the plays approved by the censors, and their coffin-making bringing in too little income, theatre directors were happy to turn a blind eye when black-marketeers turned up with pirated videos of Western movies.
Outside the theatre, posters showed a frowning Romanian soldier. You bought a ticket ostensibly to find out what psychological problems he suffered during the Second World War. Inside, when the curtains rose, instead of the actor wrestling with his political conscience, you saw two large colour TVs waiting for you. The lights went down and the video began: Bruce Lee or 007 came out fighting. And it was my voice on the dubbed sound-track which turned James Bond into a Soviet double agent mocking imperialist spies. The story no longer made much sense, of course, but that was the only way to get the films approved. And I added a few embellishments of my own.
I was translating three movies a week, sometimes just by listening to the sound-track - though Sylvester Stallone's muddy mumble was a bit of a challenge. I had to use my imagination. Rambo cries in the lap of his former Army commander, disappointed by the public's reaction to Vietnam: 'I'm weeping because people do not realize how good Socialism is,' my translation shouted from the loudspeaker.
Sometimes the movies were pirated from Western TV and cut with advertisements. A beautiful blonde girl was skaing her hair after using I don't know what shampoo. I was supposed to keep quiet but, as the Romanian saying goes, my tongue was itching. 'Don't use this Western product, it makes your hair fall out!' my voice admonished from the screen.
The ad showed teeth too perfect to be real, then a gleaming tube of toothpaste. 'Use this toothpaste and your teeth will rot,' my voice boomed in the dark.
The audience didn't care what the translator was saying anyway. At a time when we had only two hours a day of approved TV, to see cars flying through the air or guests of the Great Gatsby dancing at his parties made people happy enough. Men, women and children crowded into the theatres as never before. Now, just imagine the uproar when the power was cut in a hall of 400 seats filled with a thousand people or more.
The fun went on until Securitate found out whose mocking voice was doing the dubbing, and then I was banned from those translations as well. Not that I had a future in that freelance job anyway. A few months later the West complained about pirated videos and Ceausescu finally found out what was happening behind his back. The theatres were empty again.
- Dan Antal
Out of Romania
Outside the theatre, posters showed a frowning Romanian soldier. You bought a ticket ostensibly to find out what psychological problems he suffered during the Second World War. Inside, when the curtains rose, instead of the actor wrestling with his political conscience, you saw two large colour TVs waiting for you. The lights went down and the video began: Bruce Lee or 007 came out fighting. And it was my voice on the dubbed sound-track which turned James Bond into a Soviet double agent mocking imperialist spies. The story no longer made much sense, of course, but that was the only way to get the films approved. And I added a few embellishments of my own.
I was translating three movies a week, sometimes just by listening to the sound-track - though Sylvester Stallone's muddy mumble was a bit of a challenge. I had to use my imagination. Rambo cries in the lap of his former Army commander, disappointed by the public's reaction to Vietnam: 'I'm weeping because people do not realize how good Socialism is,' my translation shouted from the loudspeaker.
Sometimes the movies were pirated from Western TV and cut with advertisements. A beautiful blonde girl was skaing her hair after using I don't know what shampoo. I was supposed to keep quiet but, as the Romanian saying goes, my tongue was itching. 'Don't use this Western product, it makes your hair fall out!' my voice admonished from the screen.
The ad showed teeth too perfect to be real, then a gleaming tube of toothpaste. 'Use this toothpaste and your teeth will rot,' my voice boomed in the dark.
The audience didn't care what the translator was saying anyway. At a time when we had only two hours a day of approved TV, to see cars flying through the air or guests of the Great Gatsby dancing at his parties made people happy enough. Men, women and children crowded into the theatres as never before. Now, just imagine the uproar when the power was cut in a hall of 400 seats filled with a thousand people or more.
The fun went on until Securitate found out whose mocking voice was doing the dubbing, and then I was banned from those translations as well. Not that I had a future in that freelance job anyway. A few months later the West complained about pirated videos and Ceausescu finally found out what was happening behind his back. The theatres were empty again.
- Dan Antal
Out of Romania
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